Virtual Junkie

Initially I thought perhaps assumed, okay maybe not.

Knew it deep down in my heart, in the depths of the muscles of my heart, among the ventricles and atrium, between the aorta and the vena cava, that the Internet was a F.A.C.I.L.I.T.Y. 

And that I do not rely on the medium out of my interest but because of the daily work I am involved in, which requires its expertise. 

Not only work, my interests lies among the World Wide Web too! OK I do have other interests. But even to pursue them I need WWW. 

I am officially an Internet Junkie. 

Something I probably was too afraid to admit for making myself look TOTALLY dependent on this new age invention. 

Compared to Edison's electricity, Internet is relatively new, so yeah.

I-God

Note: The following was with reference to the States, I ain't no idea how the rest of the world is responding to the same news. :-) And its just for humor, though its content is true with reference to The New York Times.

Image courtesy of thundersquee.com

The recent Iphone apps that are becoming the talk of town are the one targetted at God and his (dis)likes. Both religious representative, atheists have begun producing Iphone apps for the benefit of their believers. These apps serve the purpose of  wanting to have a conversation with another with opposing beliefs and getting them to see reason.

"Say someone calls you narrow-minded because you think Jesus is the only way to God," says one top-selling application introduced in March by a Christian publishing company. "Your first answer should be: 'What do you mean by narrow-minded?' " -The New York Times

By not being 'broad-minded'? What kinda question is that?

BibleThumper, an app for the skeptics to share some humor around their religious counterparts. It allows the users to be ready to 'attack' with phrases from the Bible.

Some christian foundations are becoming increasingly worried at the rising numbers of atheist and Christians who are evolving into skeptics. Hence, they are doing their part to outnumber the Iphone apps that might influence minds by coming up with their respective apps for the religious ones. Then again, there are many such apps in existence already.

Image courtesy of iphonesaviour.com

For the non-believers who happen to own an Iphone and lack apps that are similar to their mindset, have Jason Hagen to thank for. Apparently, he bought an Iphone and was disappointed by the overwhelming number of religious apps and nothing for individuals like him. Voila! He soon wrote the now famous app, The Atheist Pocket Debator. 

Iphone app created by religious personels like the Fast Facts; provides immediate access to Bible information and everything else related to it. It encourages the user to question non believers and their apparoach towards religion. For instance,

"When someone says, "There is no truth,' " the Fast Facts app advises, "ask them: 'Is that true? Is it true there is no truth?' Because if it's true that there is no truth, then it's false that 'there is no truth.' " - The New York Times

When I first read that, man, I was laughing out loud. It sounded hilarious and yeah perhaps a little confusing at the same time. I was even planning on putting it up as a facebook status, such are the days of social networking. 

One interesting and funny one was by The Atheist Pocket Debater,

If Jacob saw the face of God (in Genesis 32:30), and God said, "No man shall see me and live" (in Exodus 33:20), then "which one is the liar?" he asks. - The New York Times

That was freakin' hilarious! If I were to use this on Jan, she will skin me alive and hang me out to dry. =.= 

My Baby

Her name is Bette. Ain't she cute? 

A woman writes to the IT support for Assistance

I received this as a forwarded email. No idea who the creative author is or...maybe it really did happen ; )

Dear Tech Support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and I noticed a distinct slowdown in the overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewellery applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed undesirable programs such as! NEWS 5.0, MONEY 3.0 and CRICKET 4.1.

Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system..

Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.

What can I do?

Signed,

Reply

DEAR Madam,

First, keep ! in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system.

Please enter command: ithoughtyoulovedme. vbs and try to download Tears 6.2 and do not forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update.

If that application works as designed, Husband1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewellery 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.

However, remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Silence 2.5 or Beer 6.1.

Please note that Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Snoring Loudly Beta.

Whatever you do, DO NOT under any circumstances install Mother-In-Law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.)

In addition, please do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly.

You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance.

We recommend! : Cooking 3..0 and Good Looks 7.7.

Good Luck Madam!